Make room for your dreams!

I paid a visit to my favourite YouTuber Melissa Alexnadira’s new webpage where she put on resources she created for personal development. Most of her work talks about setting goals and achieving them. I very much appreciate her passion and effort, but I think not everyone can benefit from her work because most people live in a mess.

Melissa asks people to picture their perfect life and write down their life goals. Then she tells people to break the big goals into small chunks. That’s a very classical tip offered by motivation gurus. But most people, people in reality, are too BUSY. Their schedules are too busy to allow themselves enough sleep, let alone fit in a daily task that pave the way towards reaching long term goals.

I am not making excuses for people who choose to lead a busy life. What I am suggesting is, motivation gurus can perhaps start their 101 with a lesson of decluttering and downsizing. The problem with those people is that they have too many physical stuff as well as the untangible like meetings, gatherings and shopping to do. If they simplify their world by limiting what they need to get by, their schedules will then have room for new projects.

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💸My Old Spending Habit (2 of 2)💸The Turning Point

My first taste of how minimalism could bring clarity and focus in life was dated back to 2008. During my short immersion in Australia, I’ve experienced how little one actually needs in order to survive and be happy.

As an avid reader, I came across several books written by decluttering experts in Japan and they were great guides to decluttering but I wasn’t ready to fully implement minimalism yet.

Then quite unexpectedly, two months before my graduation, I suffered a setback in the love department. I was so heartbroken that I was forced to re-evaluate every single belief of mine because all along I was wired to think “he” was “the one”. Something must be wrong in my head and I needed to know what it was.

I was in desperately need to move on and start from a clean slate. So I pulled out all possessions and looked at them one by one. “Does it reflect my ideal self?” I asked. If it didn’t, I tossed it to the trolley which was filled with clothes, books and trinkets to be donated to the Salvatory Army.

It was one of the wisest decisions I made for myself because thanks to my determination to downsize my stuff, my two movings in 2011 and 2012 became much less of a burden. I didn’t have a crazy amount of boxes to pack and unpack.

💸My Old Spending Habit (1 of 2)💸

I am not being one of those self admitted shopaholics who take their syndrome proudly as a prize when I say this, but I used to be very, very lavish.

All my friends know my bad spending habit. When I went out, I would spend the last banknote in my purse. There had been times when there wasn’t enough bus fare left that I needed to borrow a few dollars from my friend.

It all started when I was twelve. I didn’t want to feel inferior with my affluent friend. Since we met at weekend for tutorial class, I bought a new T-shirt, vest or sweater every week just to keep up with her abundant closet!

Luckily this friendship didn’t last long, or else I would certainly be broke from the additional expenditure starting from the age of thirteen when I was introduced to k-pop by my friend.

Not many people listened to Korean music in Hong Kong in early 2000s and so Korean stars’ products weren’t that widely available. It was almost like an obligation as a fan to buy every spotted knickknack with a Korean star’s face printed on it. I could have paid the first instalment of a mortgage had I not spent all those money on H.O.T, Shinhwa and some other K-pop bands.

Things didn’t get any better when I was juggling the development of both the brain and the body throughout the four years in college. My thirst for cultural input got me hunting for books and video discs which might not be relevant to my profession. My poor understanding of my body shape and skin type, and most importantly the lies told by advertisers and my impressionability, fooled me into buying an abominable amount of products that didn’t serve me.

不必做到最好

凡事不必做到最好,做得就可以了。

「最」這個字有競爭的意味,在追求完美的同時,難免會有被打敗的恐懼。

把拿第一名的概念拋棄,一心想著如何把自己的事做好,不妒忌亦不害怕別人跟自己一樣優秀,容許其他人分享到成功的滋味,這樣的人才是真正的自信,真正的王者。

How To Get Rid of a Habit?

A: Do it repeatedly.
Think about how our skin eventually gets used to the most potent cosmetic product. The impact will lower as time goes by, otherwise consumers can stock enough bottles for the rest of their lives. It is not just the matter of shelf life but once our skin gets used to certain ingredients, it can’t be stimulated anymore. Those who say humans are creatures of habits must have overlooked the battle between laziness (conforming to an old habit) and boredom (forming new habits) in the calculation of highly efficient individuals.

 📝女文青談寫📝寫筆記的意義在於調整生活

之前一篇文章提過,寫筆記(journaling)是增加執行力的要素之一。

到底journaling核心意義是甚麼?是調整生活。

有曰:「人是受制於習慣的生物(Humans are creatures of habits)」,而壞習慣往往是不自知的,若不是從書本或講座中受到啟發,或有良師益友從旁指出,人們對自己的行為往往是後知後覺的。

要對治這個狀況,可以靠白紙黑字的記錄,如實面對自己重覆的錯誤。

臨睡前吾必定先做筆記,回想一天裡面好與不太好的作法,值得繼續的打剔號,應該馬上摒棄的打叉號。

以下是吾最常回顧的生活事項:

  • 飲食 (若有偏差,改天立刻調整,例如少吃點/選沙律/喝果汁)
  • 衣飾的配搭效果
  • 護膚品的效果
  • 跟家人、朋友、戀人的相處與互動
  • 工作上的成就和可改進的地方